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A Fresh Look at the Price of Motherhood

Why Ann Crittenden says the most important job in the world is still the least valued

marriage – and divorce.

"Moreover, in many courts of law, it is still considered unnatural for a wife and mother to claim a material reward for her labors on behalf of the family," Crittenden writes. "This makes wives the only workers in the economy expected to work for no remuneration, which is obviously why women as a group are still so much poorer than men."

Crittenden asserts that because caring for one's children is a loving and moral obligation, society in general views it as appalling to attach a price tag to motherhood. She argues that our courts apparently uphold this notion. "Family law doesn't consider raising a family equal to making money," she says.

Arguments abound surrounding the economic lives of homemakers. A common statement is that if a wife has children and stays home with them, "it is her choice."

"But mothers' choices are not made in a vacuum," Crittenden counters in her book. "They are made in a world that women never made, according to the rules they didn't write. To take just one example, what many mothers really want is a good part-time job, yet there is no rich and vibrant part-time labor market in the United States; as one observer has commented, we have many more choices in breakfast cereals than we do in work arrangements." This is the very reason Crittenden walked the path of stay-at-home motherhood. There were simply no part-time jobs open to her in journalism.

With the research and revelations in her book, Crittenden hopes to raise the consciousness of all types of mothers. She made the decision to stay at home with her son, but different women are going to make different decisions. Her goal is to have the options for mothers opened to them so their creer vs. motherhood choice doesn't have to be like hers – all or nothing.

"We don't need to focus on what we should do [full time career vs. full time mothering], but no matter what you do, the work is not getting recognized," says Crittenden. Research indicates that working mothers put in 80 to 100 hours a week between their careers and child rearing.

While Crittenden was freelancing and working on "The Price of Motherhood," her teenage son quipped, "You have such a pathetic life, just sitting in front of the computer." But as Crittenden's book was published and began earning rave reviews, her son's tune changed as he saw the fruits of her labor. He then told her, "You worked so hard and it paid off. I'm so proud of you!" A lesson of a lifetime from mother to son. Priceless.