Attention Deficit Disorder

How It Affects the Family

By Gwen Morrison

Attention deficit disorder (ADD) and/or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) are among the most common conditions diagnosed in children today. Characterized by symptoms such as inattentiveness, hyperactivity and impulsiveness, these disorders can be frustrating for parents and children alike. Living with a child that has been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD can bring out a lot of emotions within a family; some are good while others are bad. It is not uncommon for siblings to become jealous of the attention that is given to the affected child, and often they will resent the extra burden of responsibility that is placed on them.

There are ways to alleviate some of the negative feelings within the home. Parents need to remember that ADD affects not only the individual who has been diagnosed with the disorder, but all members of the family. Living with ADD can be very stressful at times. It is important for families to keep the lines of communication open for everyone. Here are some things that parents can do to help the siblings of ADD children:

• Explain to your child about ADD so they know what to expect.
• Tell them your expectations of their sibling what he can and can't do.
• Ask them how they think the illness is affecting them.
• Make sure they know that it is not their fault.
• Share with them ways to express their frustration in a productive way.
• Tell them it's OK to feel angry.
• Encourage them to keep a journal (if age allows) of how they are feeling, then take time once a week to review it with them.

When a parent is spending all of their energy supporting and finding help for their ADD child, it is easy to neglect the other children. Often a sibling will have a lack of affection towards their brother or sister.

"I couldn't stand it when she started raging. She would yell and get everyone upset," says Tim Davis, a high school student in Georgia whose sister was diagnosed at age 5 with ADD, and now suffers from other co-morbid conditions as a teenager. "Sometimes I just couldn't stand to be around her. I really thought she could control it, that she was just doing it to cause trouble."

Want to see more?

• Understanding Attention Deficit Disorder
• Focusing on Ritalin
• ADD: What's Wrong with My Child?
• Is Ritalin the Only Way?
• ADD: What's the School's Responsibility?