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The Myth of Giftedness

Do You Want a Gifted or Hardworking Child?

By Jim Taylor, Ph.D.

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Because they're gifted, these children experience early success and little or no failure. These children get straight A's, compete above their age group in their sport or take advanced classes in the performing arts. But sooner or later they reach a level where everyone is gifted (e.g., Harvard, the U.S. Olympic Training Center or Julliard). At this point, giftedness isn't what makes these children special because they're all gifted. And their giftedness isn't what ultimately determines who becomes truly successful. What separates those children who are simply gifted from those who are gifted and successful is whether they possess the skills to maximize their gifts.

Unfortunately, these children will find that their inborn talent is no longer sufficient to be successful. Because everything comes so easily to them, many never learn the skills – hard work, persistence, patience, perseverance, discipline – that will enable them to become truly successful. Also, at some point, gifted children do something that they've never done before: They fail – and this can be a traumatic experience. Because they have never failed before, they didn't develop the tools to respond positively to failure. It is common for gifted children to either quit or start to underachieve when first faced with failure.

Redefining Giftedness
The value of giftedness – or the harm it causes – depends on how you and your children look at it. If you and they buy into our culture's view of giftedness, then, yes, I believe that giftedness will be as much of a burden as a boon. At the same time, giftedness can be a wonderful opportunity for children to accomplish great things.

Here's what I recommend: If you think your children may be gifted, have them tested by impartial experts – parents are notoriously poor judges of their children's capabilities. If your children truly are gifted, don't tell them. There's no point. Labeling children as gifted places unnecessary pressure on them. And whether gifted or not, there's nothing they can do about it anyway. If they find out they're gifted, tell them that they're fortunate to have this talent, but it's only a starting point. Whether it is ever fully realized is entirely up to them.

Erase Giftedness From Your Vocabulary

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