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The New and Improved Silent Treatment
5 Ways to Connect With Your Children
By Vickie Falcone
For example, after hearing about the benefits of silence, Cheryl decided to bring more of it to the time she spent cuddling in the morning with her 6-year-old son, Matt. She shared this interaction:
Matt: I'm sick.
Silence
Cheryl: Do you want a cough drop?
Matt: I hate school.
Silence
Matt: I don't actually hate school. It's just that my friends are mean.
Silence
Cheryl: That doesn't feel very good, does it?
Matt: Actually, if I don't go to school, I get to see Dad. (His father worked nights.)
As often is the case, the silence invited the child's expression of strong feelings. She also acknowledged his feelings about missing his dad, which opened the communication lines even more.
We've all experienced silence that connects and silence that disconnects. The difference is your intention. We've experienced stunned silence, confused silence and numb silence, but for most of us, the friendly silence of one of these six practices will be a new experience, bringing new rewards.
Since ancient times, silence has been worshipped as an important part of many spiritual disciplines. When we make it a part of our parenting discipline, we intensify loving connections with our children. Begin today to infuse your parenting with silence and enjoy the almost immediate rewards.