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How to Adopt a "Pollyanna" Parenting Attitude This Summer

Adopt a Lighter Attitude
This Summer

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Remember Pollyanna? Parents who want to improve relationships with their children could take a few tips from this golden-haired good girl who always looked at the sunny side, no matter how stormy the sky seemed. Pegged by many in previous decades as a "goody-goody," Pollyanna and her positive attitude withstood critical commentary and finally found favor with the masses. Today, "positive thinking" fuels a multi-billion-dollar industry.

"Positive thinking" books and seminars sell out across the nation. Medical science has even taken an interest, proving that a positive outlook can improve emotional and physical health. But adopting a "Pollyanna" attitude also has another important benefit: It can help you build relationships with your kids.

"Kid's don't naturally think in a positive frame of mind," says Erin Brown Conroy, mother of 12 and author of 20 Secrets to Success With Your Child (Celtic Cross Communications, 2003). "Parents have to teach children how to look at life in a positive way."

With nearly 30 years' experience instructing children and counseling families, Conroy is a parenting columnist for Great Lakes Family Magazine, a frequent guest on radio shows and a popular speaker who shares secrets that work so well, they might seem magical. Her free report "3 Ways to Get Your Child to Listen to You" is available at ParentingWithSuccess.com.

Half Full Instead of Half Empty
"I grew up with 'hand-me-down' clothes from my big sister," Conroy says. "She was a popular cheerleader, so I didn't mind getting her clothes. In fact, I looked forward to it. As long as nobody knew where the clothes came from, it didn't matter. Our family is blessed to be on the receiving end of 'hand-me-downs.' Now I sometimes hear my kids complaining about having too many clothes as they try to stuff one more thing into the drawer. 'What a great problem to have!' I say. 'You have so many clothes, you don't know where to put them!' I want them to look at the 'problem' and see a bigger picture of generosity and kindness."

To help your children learn how to look at the glass as half full instead of half empty, focus on what you say. Learn how to put requests in the positive instead of the negative, and watch the difference it makes in your child's response! Conroy offers some examples:

  • Negative: "Don't touch that!"
  • Positive: "Please keep your hands to yourself."
  • Negative: "Don't run in the house!"
  • Positive: "Please walk in the house."
  • Negative: "Don't hit your sister!"
  • Positive: "Please treat your sister kindly."
  • Negative: "Don't leave your books out on the floor!"
  • Positive: "Please put your books where they belong."

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