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Home › Articles › Holiday: Winter › Is There Really a Santa?

Is There Really a Santa?

7 Tips to Help You Answer the Santa Question

By Thomas Haller and Chick Moorman, authors of The 10 Commitments: Parenting with Purpose

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You might get the question when your child is 4 years old or when he is 5. She might wait to ask it until she is 7. Regardless of when it comes, will you be ready for, "Mommy, is there really a Santa?"

What are you going to say when you hear the Santa question? Will you stumble over your words? Will you tell a half-truth or perhaps tell a lie? Will you be tempted to avoid answering the question in an attempt to preserve the mystery and your personal enjoyment for one more year?

Whether you are ready or not, the question is coming. How you answer it can help your child accept the answer she seeks. These suggestions will guide you in your preparation.

1. Before answering your child's Santa question directly, ask clarifying questions.
Determine his present frame of reference and how much his peers or siblings have already told him. The fact that your child has asked this question indicates that he has been thinking about it and needs further clarification.

Ask your child what she has been thinking, who has given her information and what she feels about what she already knows. From the answers you get to these questions you will glean what information needs to be clarified and where you need to begin.

2. Once you have information about what your child already knows ask him, "Do you really want to know?"
Some children don't want the answer. For them, it is enough to simply talk about what they know now. Their goal is to verify what they presently know and nothing more. They may return at a later date to learn more, but some children take away what they already know and do not return. They hold on to the mystery of Santa in their own way and preserve it into adulthood.

Most children, however, want to know. If they want verification and explanation, their answer to "Do you really want to know?" will be, "Yes." Their "yes" is often accompanied by a sad look on their face.


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