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Home › Articles › Your Children › Cut!

Cut!

6 Tips for Helping Kids Cope

By Sue Marquette Poremba

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Maher, who is also the team psychologist for the Cleveland Indians and the Cleveland Cavaliers, points out that adolescents, whatever their natural talent levels may be, also tend to vary a great deal in their emotions and self-esteem. "If making the elite and travel teams signifies external rewards and recognitions, and the unabashed showcasing of young players and their coaches, this narcissistic attitude and self-centeredness will reinforce to those who do not make the teams that they are not 'good' people," he says.

The most obvious external reward is being able to be a part of a team and with that, the knowledge that, for now, the child's athletic ability is considered best among his or her peers. On the flip side, the children who don't get picked suffer a severe blow to their ego, and it is up to the parents to apply the salve.

"There is no way being cut won't hurt," says Maureen Busch of Stow, Mass., who has three children participating in sports. Although her children have made select teams, they have also been cut from teams before.

"The worst time came when my second son was cut from a team he had been on for multiple seasons," Busch says. "Everyone assumed he would make it again. That was a time he needed a lot more moral support. He felt a true sense of having lost something."

Helping Them Cope

What can parents do to help their child survive being passed over for a select team?

1. Explain that everyone gets a turn to shine.


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