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Freedom of Speech?
Children Who Speak Their Minds
By Carma Haley
Outspokenness in children can begin at a very early age. However, once they begin to show the trait, parents can look forward to living with an outspoken child for a very long time. "My daughter is the most outspoken of my two children," says Crystal Cook, a mother from Knoxville, Tenn. "My daughter became a 'smarty-pants' almost as soon as she learned to talk. I suspected it even before then from her actions. She didn't want me to hand her the cup. She wanted to get it herself. Now, she simply has to be right all the time. She doesn't like to listen to any other opinions, and will generally tune out anyone trying to help her. Now that she's a preteen, it has escalated to almost unbearable proportions. She'd argue with me over the color of a tree's leaves. I'd say 'green'; she'd say, 'No, it's not green, it's emerald.'"
How does a parent deal with an outspoken child? According to Pieper, it takes consistency and patience. "When dealing with an outspoken child, a parent must learn patience, understanding and tolerance to a point. Boundaries must be set prior to any major outspokennes. Let the child know where these boundaries are and what the consequences will be if/when they are crossed. When the child begins to become rude, overly bossy or just plain mean, a parent must be willing to step in and let the child know they have crossed the line of their set boundaries and it is time to pay the consequences. Stressing consistence does not even begin to tell how important it is. A parent must be consistent with the boundaries that are set and not allow the child to 'talk' or 'deal' their way out."