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March 26, 2003
How Do You Explain War to Kids?
I have a lot to talk about and if you really want my thoughts and feelings on this war, you can read my Moms Today Diary.
With the recent events, I have decided that I would explain to my children what is going on. They have a right to know. I had told them what happened on 9/11 and they understood, as best as could be expected. So I did not find this extremely difficult. I have to be honest, though: I didn’t know how to explain it. I decided to give a little history on the Gulf War and Saddam Hussein, whom I described as the “bad guy.” I told them that he didn’t “play by the rules” and that he had been very greedy for money and wanted countries that did not belong to him. So, the US had to help out. I explained that Saddam was given chances to start obeying the rules and that he didn’t want to. The boys understood this VERY well. I do NOT let them watch a lot of news, but they have watched some footage with me. They understand a LOT more than I expected they would.
A Disappointing Outcome
The last time I updated, I talked about starting Chris on a supplement to help with his focusing abilities. Well, he seemed to be doing well until I started getting call after call from his teacher. Each day she called, the situation was MUCH worse than before. She explained to me that since she has not seen any change in his behavior, that she was forced to start “statting” him. I guess that meant that she would have to start testing him for the Special Ed classes. UGH. On Thursday of that same week, I had a breakdown at work in which I was told, by his teacher, that there was an incident with glue. I guess he decided that he didn’t want to use HIS glue during class time but had stolen a little girl’s glue that her mom had JUST bought for her. He wrote his name on it and told his teacher that I had bought it for his supplies. Well, his teacher found out what he had done and sent him to the principal’s office. (Among many other issues that were happening.) Well, I decided that we needed to see our PCP to re-evaluate the medication issue. I spent some time crying in my boss’ office and she understood that it was a difficult time for me. I was able to leave early to pick up Chris for an appointment at 3:30pm. By the time I got to the school, he had been in and out and BACK in the principal’s office. Much to my dismay, the girls in the office were GLARING at me. (Like this was my fault.) Apparently, Chris had been sent BACK to class. Being that he was mad that he had been caught and that he could not USE this girl’s glue, he proceeded to pour it ALL over the table and basically just “swam” in it. The principal explained that they had spent most of 30 minutes just cleaning him up. He was covered from head to toe in glue. Talk about wanting to MELT into the floor and just die! I packed him up and silently drove the 20 minutes to his doctor’s office. I explained to the doctor about my melt down and stress levels and the fact that he was just getting worse and worse, including the fact that I called her office crying because I just didn’t know what to do. Sitting in the doctor’s office, I came to terms with putting my child on medication. (Sigh)
The doctor suggested a NON-stimulant drug called Strattera, which I had heard of from the Neuropsychologist. She said that so far, this drug has not shown any side effects and that all of her patients who have been placed on this drug have been doing really well. She gave me a starter pack and said that she wanted to see us back in 2 weeks, adding that she doesn’t usually just hand out meds, but given the Psychologist’s report and our growing situation, it was necessary.
Back at home, I promptly went online to do some research on this new drug because it has not been on the market very long. I went to Web MD and found what I needed. I printed off some sheets of information that were satisfying to me and spoke with Andrew about it the very next day. I gave him a few days to let it sink in and on Sunday of that week, he looked over the reports I had found. He looked up at me and said that he was interested in trying it to see how Chris would do. There was really no where else to turn. We were a lot more comfortable with this medication since it is NOT a controlled substance and I felt that we would probably see a response pretty quickly.
About 4 days after starting the medication, Chris starting showing marked improvement. He was much happier when I picked him up from school and could NOT WAIT to tell me about his day. For three days straight, he was on green card in class all day long, which means that the teacher did not have to give him any warnings or take any disciplinary action with him AT ALL! I can’t tell you how shocked I was. Since this week has been spring break, it is hard to tell how the medication is actually working, but I have seen my child transformed from being my highest stress level to becoming a very pleasant, easy going, happy person. I still want to give it some time, but I am nearly convinced that this may be the key for us right now. Our follow up appointment is next Thursday with the PCP to go over his progress. I will update then.
Now, I would like to apologize for the fact that I have only talked about Chris in the last few diary entries. Ben is just as important to me, but there have been a lot of developments of the situation with Chris that I felt the need to talk about. I promise to even it out more in my following entries.
Hope you join us next time. Until then,
Heather, Ben, & Chris
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